dough-zilla

the cloudy, drizzly skies that hung over us this past weekend were not fit for playing outside, so it seemed like a perfect opportunity for jordan and me to try our hands at making another loaf of the long-heralded crusty-on-the-outside, fluffy-on-the-inside tuscan bread. i will be the first to admit i was a bit jealous of his solo bread-baking success (after i had tried twice and failed, his matched attempts produced delicious, warm, perfect bread).
so we found a recipe which, to our delight, did not require a trip to the grocery store to find obscure ingredients. 2 packets of yeast, water, flour (whole wheat and all purpose), salt. easy.

we were a little off-put at the amount of yeast the recipe called for (two entire packages?  yikes!)  nevertheless... we watched carefully, vigilantly, while 5-7 minutes passed as we waited for the yeast to bubble. bubbling successful, we combined the remaining ingredients exactly as the recipe indicated. lovingly, i kneaded the dough, coaxing it into a lovely little round. gingerly placing it in the oiled bowl, we were ready to cover and let rise, when we encountered our first big dilemma: what kind of cover should go over the bowl, plastic wrap or a towel? after much debate, we settled on plastic wrap, our reasoning being that the plastic would better retain the heat that the dough gives off, causing it to rise more effectively.

the efficacy of the dough rising was exacerbated by the "warm spot" we selected to let the bread rise in: an open desk drawer which is aligned directly over a floor heating vent.

so after about twenty minutes when the dough was definitely twice, if not more, its original size, we were giving each other fives, totally impressed with our vastly improved skills as masters of bread baking. but we spoke too soon... not wanting to deter from the recipe's suggestions, we continued to let the bread rise for the recommended hour. by this time, it was touching the top of the plastic wrap and reeking of yeast (not a great sign, in hindsight...)
still, we continued the recipe's instructions to the letter... pounded the dough down, let it rest for a minute, shape into an oval, and let rise for another hour. sounds foolproof enough. except after 20 minutes, the dough somehow continued to grow even bigger, creeping off the edge of the floured board which weakly tried to support the expanding monstrosity.

well i am sure you can surmise the outcome of this catastrophe.  the loaf looked beautiful... but the taste was, well, like bread soaked in old cat pee.  the cause?  over-risen dough (duh.)

so, into the garbage went the failed loaf.  and just like the streets of tokyo at the hands of that famous gargantuan lizard, our hopes of enjoying a delicious, warm slice of bread fresh out of the oven, slathered with a bit of butter and jam, were pulverized.